Envious Mother. Getty Images/iStockPhoto
Could your mom be jealous of you?
• Is your mother controlling, a narcissist?
• Does it always feel like a competition while in one another company?
• She doesn't support you or show concern in your life.
• Downplays your achievements.
• Shows Favoritism.
• Gaslights you.
If any of these sound familiar to you, then my dear, you may have a jealous mother. As a kid, we don't see the obvious turmoil or those gut-wrenching feelings we experience as abnormal. We simply think this is just the way it is. Then you grow up and begin to realize something isn't right.
The jealous are troublesome to others, but a torment to themselves. – William Penn
Imagine having a child, loving that child throughout the pregnancy and childhood, and helping them strive to be just as great as you are or even better, and watching them evolve into the person you always wanted them to be. Now, imagine that same scenario, except you are in competition with them, you have negative feelings towards their accomplishments, and you covet what they have earned. Seems hard to picture, huh? Unfortunately, this situation is one that, in fact, occurs more than we would like to admit.
The bond between a mother and a daughter is one like no other; the nine-month physical connection, the growth, the love, the lessons, the shared life. Like many relationships, though, there are issues, but what happens when the issues have the ability to ruin such an important relationship? What happens when that issue slithering through is the green monster of jealousy?
Copyrighted Image: License: Shena L. Vee
A normal mother is typically proud of their child. They want their daughter to do even better than they have done in life. They are encouraging and find any opportunity to praise their kid. On the other end, though, there is the narcissistic or self-centered mother who looks at their daughter as competition, who portrays envious traits, and who wants their daughter to do just well enough in life they don’t do better than them.
What could possibly cause a parent to feel such a negative emotion towards a child that they created? Whatever the cause, we can conclude that there are many negative implications. There are mental, physical, and emotional impacts. This type of issue could cause developmental delays, feelings of being unloved or disliked, an inability to maintain relationships, the terrible thoughts of never being good enough, the need to please and keep others happy, insecurities, and more.
Relationships between a child and a parent can be complicated, but things should not be more complex due to discontentment. Jealousy is, indeed, trouble for many other people, but those in which it inhabits suffer the most.
Written By: Symone Dashell & Shena L. Vee